Let’s end the paradox of kindness

SmartBlog on Leadership   Article

“Employees complain in engagement surveys that their bosses don’t treat them with respect or as unique individuals. Yet on the flip side, research shows that bosses who treat people with kindness, respect and dignity are “seen as less powerful than other managers.”

What a dreadful paradox: We want to be treated with kindness yet don’t respect those who do so. What’s up with this?

In the workplace, kindness — being friendly, generous and considerate — is often dismissed as a weakness because of the negative stereotypes that cling to it: pushover, sucker, patsy or nice guy (or gal) who finishes last. Kindness isn’t typically rewarded at review time, given that most business performance is evaluated on what’s done rather than how it’s done.

Soft skills such as kindness lose their sizzle (if they ever had any) when compared with off-the-charts sales and other impressive bottom-line impacts delivered by the tough guys whose bad behavior often gets overlooked. …

So how does a character-based leader who wants to treat employees with dignity escape the paradox of the kindness hamster wheel? ….”

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